'Nuff Said

WARNER: I hope in the recesses of your heart that you know that strategy will continue the casualties, stress on our forces, stress on military families, stress on all Americans. Are you able to say at this time, if we continue what you have laid before the Congress, this strategy, that if you continue, you are making America safer?

PETRAEUS: Sir, I believe that this is indeed the best course of action to achieve our objections in Iraq.

WARNER: Does that make America safer?

PETRAEUS: Sir, I don’t know actually. I have not sat down and sorted out in my own mind. What I have focused on and been riveted on is how to accomplish the mission of the Multinational Force in Iraq.
---

So the top commander in Iraq doesn't know if we are safer because of this war? Someone forgot their talking points!

Iraq is like Vietnam, But it's Also Not!

April 2004 prime time press conference:
"REPORTER: Thank you, Mr. President. Mr. President, April is turning into the deadliest month in Iraq since the fall of Baghdad, and some people are comparing Iraq to Vietnam and talking about a quagmire. Polls show that support for your policy is declining and that fewer than half Americans now support it. What does that say to you and how do you answer the Vietnam comparison?

THE PRESIDENT: I think the analogy is false. I also happen to think that analogy sends the wrong message to our troops, and sends the wrong message to the enemy. Look, this is hard work. It's hard to advance freedom in a country that has been strangled by tyranny. And, yet, we must stay the course, because the end result is in our nation's interest."

Oh, ok. I get it. Iraq is not like Vietnam. In fact even making the comparison is bad for the troops. This is just typical liberal troop hating left-wing media garbage. Fair enough.

But wait a minute.

August 22, 2007 Speech to the veterans of foreign war:
"Finally, there was Vietnam. This is a complex and painful subject for many Americans, and the tragedy of Vietnam is too large to be contained in one speech. So I will limit myself to one argument that has particular significance today. Then as now, people argued that the real problem was America’s presence and that if we would just withdraw, the killing would end.”

So when it doesn't help to serve his agenda Iraq is nothing like Vietnam. But when it does, let the comparisons roll!

What was that word the righties kept throwing at John Kerry? Man, I wish i could remember it.....Oh right. Flip Flopper.

**Side Note: This isn't really surprising seeing as Bush has compared Iraq to pretty much every other war including: the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, World War I, World War II, and Korea! My only question for Mr. Bush is where is the comparison to the Barbary Wars where the U.S. bravely fought Morocco, Algiers, Tunis, and Tripoli. Most likely because this war involved pirates. Yes, real bona fide pirates.

Anybody seen Those Guns?

According to a new report from the U.S. Government Accountability Office, (ha ha ha! Who would have guessed we have one of these?!? They must have buried it down in the basement of the State Department next to the Unicorn Tracking Office for the last 7 years!) it seems that the Pentagon cannot account for 190,000 weapons distributed to Iraqi Security forces. Mostly AK-47's and pistols, the unaccounted for weapons represent about 30% of the weapons distributed to the Iraqi Security forces and the Pentagon concedes that some of those missing weapons have probably fallen into the hands of insurgents and are probably being used against U.S. troops.

So, I hate to say I told you so...but I told you so. Wait, now that I think about it, I actually told you so twice. Let me check...Yep! I did tell you so twice. I told you, HERE when the U.S. decided to arm the Sunni insurgents and HERE when they announced they were going to sell billions of dollars worth of weapons to our various Middle Eastern allies, that the U.S. really has very little ability to keep track of guns after they give them out. I guess if we keep giving them out because once everyone has a weapon, peace will surely follow.

Maybe the guns are with the moon tapes!

They're Livin' in a Powder Keg and We're Sellin' Them Sparks

In a brilliant strategic move towards the lofty goal of peace in the Middle East, the Bush Administration unveiled its plans to sell $20 billion worth of weapons to Saudi Arabia, the UAE, Kuwait, Qatar, Bahrain and Oman. The drive behind the move to arm the countries that are considered U.S. allies in the Middle East is the growing military capabilities of Iran. Secretary of State Condi Rice even went so far as to say that "There isn't a doubt that Iran constitutes the single most important single-country strategic challenge to the United States and to the kind of the Middle East that we want to see".

Wow! It sounds like Iran is a real problem. I guess it is too bad that we blew our wad in Iraq and are now pretty much powerless to do anything to stop them. Oh wait! I know what we could do...get Iran's enemies to PAY us for weapons! We could actually make money off of the Middle East's descent into complete chaos! Brilliant idea since we have such an awesome history of being able to keep track of weapons after we sell them to other countries. I hope that Condi gets somebody to pinky swear that they won't use those weapons on us!

Oh...And isn't Saudi Arabia funding the Sunni insurgents and refusing to cooperate with the new Iraqi government? I guess it doesn't matter since we have also started arming the Sunni insurgents ... oh and since the Iraqi government is on vacation it doesn't really matter if Saudi Arabia won't cooperate with them.

DOUBLE BONUS ROUND: How many 9/11 Hijackers were from Saudi Arabia? How many names on the current FBI most wanted Terrorist List are from one of these 6 countries?

TRIPLE BONUS: Anyone know what awesome ballad I stole the title of this post from?

If You Can't Beat 'Em, Arm 'Em

This past week it was confirmed that part of the U.S.'s new war plan for Iraq is to arm the Sunni insurgents and allow them the opportunity to help fight al-Qaeda and other radical insurgent groups that have been terrorizing the region. The move is a rather significant admission that the U.S. is now realizing that, after investing more then $15 billion to build them up, it cannot depend on the unreliable Iraqi military or police.

There are so many things wrong with this I don't even know where to begin so I guess I'll go with a question and answer format. Get excited because today we will all get a little history lesson with our Good Times and hopefully I will answer some questions for those of you who are scratching your heads in confusion.

1.) Aren't the Sunni insurgents "bad"?
Well, technically, yes, they are. Well, were and are. Initially, they were pretty upset about the invasion of their country (more about why they are pissed in a minute), but the U.S. is banking on them being MORE angry about the fact that other radical insurgent groups are blowing up a lot of Iraqis.

2.) But weren't the Sunni insurgents friends with the other radical insurgent groups (a lot of whom are also Sunnis)?
You have a good memory! Yes! They were. Initially, most of the identified insurgent groups in Iraq considered each other allies with a common cause. Now the Sunni insurgents believe that the other insurgent groups are killing far too many Iraqis.

3.) Why were the Sunnis so mad in the first place? Shouldn't ALL Iraqis be mad about the invasion of their country?
Why yes they should, but the Shi'ites are less mad because of L. Paul "Jerry" Bremer.

4.) But who is L. Paul "Jerry" Bremer?
Oh how quickly you forget! In May 2003, Paul Bremer took over as Director of Reconstruction and Humanitarian Assistance in Iraq (you can laugh here because I bet you didn't even know that was a job, given the state of reconstruction and humanitarian assistance in Iraq). In this capacity, Bremer was in charge of all things civilian. During the year he was in charge, he issued 100 Orders. These orders were "binding instructions or directives to the Iraqi people that create penal consequences or have a direct bearing on the way Iraqis are regulated, including changes to Iraqi law."

Order #1 was the "DE-BA`ATHIFICATION OF IRAQI SOCIETY" which banned all members of Saddam Hussein's Ba'ath party from working in government, education, etc. The Ba'ath party was pretty much all Sunnis and had been in charge for over 20 years meaning that they were also the people who had any knowledge about how to run the country.

Order #2 was the "DISSOLUTION OF ENTITIES WITH ANNEX A" which dissolved the Iraqi military, leaving about 350,000 young Iraqis with military training UNEMPLOYED and ANGRY.

I don't have the room or the energy to subject you to a listing of Paul Bremer's 98 other bad ideas. I do recommend you read them here.

4.) So he ostracized the Ba'ath Party (Sunnis) AND he disbanded the Iraqi Military? Where are you going with this?
Simple. One of the major reasons the new Iraqi Military and Iraqi Police forces are having such a hard time getting on their feet is the lack of experienced officers. There is a lack of experience in the Iraqi government, military, and police because the U.S. either banned the experienced people from participating or fired them all together.

5.) Hmmmm...So the Sunni insurgents have a lot to be angry at the U.S. about. Should we really be giving them guns just because the pinky swear to not use them on us?
No. We shouldn't. They could use them on the al-Qaeda related insurgent groups in Iraq. That could happen. Or they could use them to kill Shiites...or Americans...or other Sunnis. In general with this kind of thing, experience tells us you don't just "throw more guns in the mix".

6.) Experience? Surely we haven't done anything like this before.
Flashback, 1979. It was the year I was born, it was also the year that the Soviets invaded Afghanistan (coincidentally, it was also the year that Saddam Hussein took over in Iraq). After the Soviet invasion of Iraq, the U.S. financed, armed, and trained the mujahideen (in this case, Afghanistani Muslims that comprised the groups that opposed the Soviet occupation; Ronald Reagan called them "freedom fighters"). The mujahideen helped bring about an end to the Soviet occupation of Afghanistan, but the various factions that had united to defeat the Soviets quickly turned on each other. The country descended into civil war and out of that civil war rose the Taliban.

The U.S. proves time and time again that it doesn't learn from its mistakes. Arming one faction in a civil war that we don't understand, in a country that we don't understand, is the worst idea I have heard in a very long time. It might be a worse idea than the gay bomb.

*Thanks to Jenny for the tip!

Perhaps THIS Will Change Your Mind!

President Bush was undeterred when the Bi-partisan Iraq Study Group* told him: "The United States should not make an open-ended commitment to keep large numbers of American troops deployed in Iraq". He didn't sway when a study sponsored by MIT listed the number of casualties as a result of the U.S. invasion of Iraq at 655,000. He didn't even change his tune when a multi-agency National Intelligence Estimate declared that the war in Iraq has made the U.S. less safe and "has made the overall terrorism problem worse”, but now the President is coming around saying today that he will come to a compromise with Congress on funding the Iraq war and that compromise will include benchmarks.

Why the shift towards compromise? This reporter** thinks it might have something to do with the fact that in a meeting this week, Bush was informed that the GOP believes the war is hurting the Republican party and that he won't be able to count on their support for much longer.

Hundreds of thousands of people dead, a world that is less safe than it was 4 years ago, the Iraqi parliament asking for a timetable for withdrawal, hundreds of billions of dollars spent, but GOD FORBID THIS WAR HURTS THE REPUBLICAN PARTY! Sheesh!

* If you haven't read the Iraq Study Group Report, you should. It is a VERY interesting read.
** I am not a reporter.

I Love You Wolfie!

World Bank President Paul Wolfowitz (who you may remember from such productions as "The Iraq War") is under fire this week after revealing that he was involved in the salary negotiations and eventual promotion of his girlfriend Shaha Riza.

I'm not at all shocked that Paul Wolfowitz went to the World Bank promising to fight corruption and then promptly engaged in corruption, I am however shocked that Wolfie has a girlfriend.

Picture a swanky cocktail party..."My boyfriend drives a Corvette," says a woman in a red dress "Well, my boyfriend orchestrated the invasion of Iraq!" says Shaha Riza. Poor Shaha Riza, your boyfriend loses.

I'd Rather Be...Anything

With the creation of the position of War Czar, the Bush Administration is proving that there are jobs that Americans won’t take.

So far, the job of War Czar, the person who would oversee the handling of the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan (good thing that 5 years in they have decided to put somebody in charge of this! Whole bunch of quick thinkers in this Administration), has been turned down by three of the four-star generals the White House has approached about the possibility of taking the office. Gen. John J. "Jack" Sheehan was asked to consider the position and told the Washington Post, “The very fundamental issue is, they don't know where the hell they're going. So rather than go over there, develop an ulcer and eventually leave, I said, 'No, thanks'".

I imagine the job posting for War Czar would go something like this:

Most Powerful Branch of Constitution-based Federal Republic with strong democratic tradition, seeks scapegoat to clean up ENORMOUS mess in Middle East. Women, Homosexuals, Nancy Pelosi, Intellectuals, accomplished War Strategists, Pacifists, and Democrats need not apply.

I guess Bush should work a little harder on getting his “Guest Worker Program” passed, since it doesn’t look like he has anyone here who is willing to take the job. Maybe he should skip the four-star generals and go right to the insane (think Katherine Harris, Donald Rumsfeld, Pat Robertson, Sam Brownback, Rick Santorum, etc.). If he can’t find a taker there, there is new potential coming across the border everyday!

Please feel free to list jobs you would take rather than be War Czar in the comments section. Most fantastic suggestion wins the prize of…the position of U.S. War Czar. Hooray!

Pace's Comments Ignite Discussion at the GTB

Gays in the military...discuss.

This post of course springs from the comments made by top U.S. Military official General Peter Pace in defense of the U.S.'s "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. In an interview with the Chicago Tribune, General Pace asserted his "personal belief" that homosexuality is immoral and therefore persons found to be homosexual should be prosecuted and presumably discharged from the military, while closeted homosexuals are free to put their lives on the line for their country as much and as often as they like.

There are currently an estimated 65,000 active gay and lesbian service personnel fighting in the U.S. military and an estimated 10,000 troops have been discharged for their sexual orientation since "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" took effect in 1994 (54 of those discharged were Arabic language specialists, just an FYI).

I've Got a Plan For Iraq

On Thursday, the Swiss accidentally invaded Liechtenstein. During a routine training exercise, 170 Swiss Infantry Soldiers got lost and wandered 1-mile over the border into the neighboring principality. Upon realizing what they had done, they quickly retreated without major diplomatic incident.

I think this could be the beginnings of a hazy framework of a plan for Iraq. We just slowly start to walk away. If anyone asks we just say "Whoops! We just got lost and wandered over here. No harm, no foul, right? Look over there! It's Superman!" Then we bolt. The Swiss are brilliant. They had a 10-minute invasion. That's what I call "Shock and Awe"!

Iraq's first war hero

Despite differences in opinions between the authors of the Good Times Blog and some of its readers we would like to dedicate this post to the courage and bravery of the men and women of the armed forces. In my opinion these men and women exhibit that courage and bravery, courage and bravery that can be shown in so many ways. Some of the troops continue to support the war, some have come out against it, while some have challenged specific military policies. Regardless their personal stories all exhibit that when it comes to the Armed Forces you just can't find a better group of guys...and gals!

I thought I'd highlight one them. Please feel free to post any tributes/shout outs in the comments. I should say that this story personally resonates with me and that is why I chose it, not because he's a military hero and (some of) his beliefs are consistent with my "left-leaning" ideology. I respect and admire just as much those who may not agree with my politics.

Eric Alva

"Alva...was a decorated staff sergeant who had served in Somalia and Japan. As troops began to push into Iraq, on March 21, 2003, Alva was leading 11 Marines among 75 or so sailors and Marines in a 50- to 55-vehicle convoy on its way from the desert in Kuwait to Basra, Iraq. It was a logistical convoy moving through the desert at night, lights out, night-vision goggles on. The sand was so kicked up it was nearly impossible for Alva to even keep track of the vehicle in front of him. At one of three stops along the way, Alva, who hadn't eaten for a full day, was heating up an MRE when he went to get something out of his Humvee. 'I took maybe a step or two,' Alva said, 'and that is when the explosion went off.' It was a land mine."

Alva was visited at Bethesda Naval Hospital by President George W. Bush, first lady Laura Bush, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Donald Rumsfeld, and Michael Jordan.

None of them knew he was gay.

Although he kept it a secret from his commanding officers over the years, Alva says plenty of soldiers knew he was gay and it was never a problem:

"I told tons of people. A lot of my friends, my buddies, my closest Marines, people I had served in combat with. Straight guys, married, with children and everything, three of them which I have become their sons' godfather now. Everybody was just respectful and was just like ordinary. 'That's it? That's your big news?' Being on the front lines and serving with the people who even actually knew that I was gay, you know, that was never a factor. We were there to do a job. We were [there] to do a mission. I don't think people would have a hard time with it because they know that the person right next to them is going to be there to protect them, in our terms, 'have their back.'"

Alva is to be commended for his service to the country. What is to be commended of these men and women is that they do put politics aside, and when given the order will fight to the death for their country. They leave the debating and disagreeing to the rest of us (which we do so well, even here at the GTB). That said, Alva is also to be commended for challenging such a discriminatory and detrimental policy. Since this policy went into effect, 11,000 individuals have been discharged from the military. That's 11,000 people that, in retrospect we couldn't really afford to lose.

BREAKING NEWS: Iraq is Stable****

Once again you are rewarded for being a loyal reader of the Good Times Blog.

Iraq is a stable country. That's right, it came straight out of the mouth of the First Lady.

Last night on Larry King Live Laura Bush said this about Iraq:

"And many parts of Iraq are stable now. But, of course, what we see on television is the one bombing a day that discourages everybody"

Just a couple of problems with that quote.

Number One: One bombing a day is too much. As I sit here typing they are flashing on CNN that a bomb in Ramadi just killed 18 kids playing soccer. Well Laura, at least now that the bombing du jour has happened were all safe for another 24 hours.

Oh except that leads me to point number 2. There is a lot more going on than one bombing a day:



So according to this figure (thanks to Thinkprogress.org) as of November 2006 there were on average 185 attacks a day by militias and insurgents. Ok, ill give it to Laura that not all of these attacks are technically "Bombings" so maybe she's right. Maybe back in October there were 184 snipings and only one bombing, and that's why the country is so stable.

But of course if you want to get technical there is of course this tidbit:

"The soccer field attack followed terrorist bombings in Baghdad at a popular ice cream shop, a parking lot and a restaurant that killed eight people and wounded 24 on Tuesday....

...

Tuesday's deadliest reported bombing took place in a popular ice cream shop in central Baghdad's mostly Shiite Karrada district. A suicide car bomber slammed into the shop, killing five people and wounding 10 others, according to an Interior Ministry official.

In the city's Tayaran Square, another bomber hid explosives inside a restaurant, where the blast killed two people and wounded eleven, the official said.

In a separate attack, Iraqi police said a car bomb blast Tuesday in a parking lot in the Karrada district killed one person and wounded three others."

Well that's definitely more than one a day.

So the truth is Iraq has gone to Shit. The next big question is how do Laura and George handle this?

BUSH:...we go to church. We exercise together, we watch movies together. We do all the other things that -- watch baseball on television, for instance -- that we both find relaxing.

KING: Do you -- do you talk about it a lot?

BUSH: We talk about it a lot. I mean, we live it.

Enjoy your baseball Laura, in the meantime Iraq has turned into a shit sandwich

***Headline in no way implies that anyone in the reality based community actually believes Iraq is stable. In fact 9 out of 10 reality based community members agree that Britney Spears is more stable than Iraq*

*No they don't I made that up.